You learn to trust your own experience when you accept the present as it is. This is the foundation of trustworthy decisions.
No matter the outcome of being present, cultivating awareness is worth it. I don’t know another way to inform myself and build trust in my decision-making process. I know the ways that numb, misinform, hurt, distort and lead me astray. Perhaps you know those ways, too. Let me tell you about a mindful way to make decisions.
To begin, develop awareness of the moment as it is, without adjusting or judging the impact. Stay neutral as you take in what is presenting itself in your field of consciousness. Pay just enough attention to whatever is there, and then let it go so you remain open to what else is there. Don’t resist, embellish, analyze or judge what is there inside and outside of you. Just notice it is there. This is foundation building for trusting your experiences.
The past and the future are not in the present, they live in your thoughts and memory. When you find your mind looping the same thoughts about the situation over and over, you’re way out of the neural looping is by stopping and with intention bring your consciousness into the present moment. You can focus on your breathing or your feet touching the ground.
Sustained awareness is cultivated through extended times of inner and outer stillness, such as in meditation. It is also cultivated through focused movement with stillness such as in qi gong, tai chi, walking meditation, painting or other rhythmic free motion artistic form, and long-distance running or swimming.
Another avenue is through nature; being still within surrounded by an alive natural environment with a held intention to pay attention to whatever you see, hear, smell, taste and feel as it changes moment to moment.
When you receive and accept the moments that make up the present as they come, over time this alters how you see yourself in the world. It alters how you hold your own space and embody it. It alters how you process information you receive from your senses, other people, the environment, and how you think. It opens your heart and mind, you grow in compassion for yourself and others, and it invites a new understanding for you to consider or let go. This change happens naturally, without striving for it.
Relevant solutions appear when you acknowledge things as they are and let them be for a time, for they are in your present awareness for a reason. Paying attention to all that actually is before analyses reveals more input to your conscious mind. Over time, cultivating present awareness develops self-reliance, the ability and confidence to see what’s true and not true for you.
Trusting your own experience comes from being open and aware while observing it play out. Be aware with your whole mind-body and six senses, (including your intuition) of whatever you are experiencing as it is occurring, and accept what is there as fully as you can, knowing you can discern the wisest understanding and response for you. Make your decision from this trusted, aware state-of-being, which is always present within you.
Please share your thoughts and experiences below. I’d love to hear what you think. Questions? I’ll answer them below too.
Kimberly Wulfert, PhD, Licensed Psychologist & Coach in Ventura & Ojai California, virtually
Are you seeking personal growth and transformation? If you are holding back and blocked from within, feeling anxious, fearful, unfulfilled, trapped, indecisive, invisible, or yearning for the release of your natural self and breaking through blocks to creative or business success, let my help you. My mindfulness-based approach may be just what you need to turn things around. The methods I use have proven their value as seen in current research on mindfulness, meditation, and neuroscience when combined with psychology. I bring 35+ years of training & work as a psychotherapist to this cutting edge work I now exclusively offer.
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