Love You More

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Humor me and do this brief exercise as you read it.

http://alicegreycollins.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/bill-brandt-interlaced-fingers-los-angeles-beach-1959.jpgLace your fingers together, thumbs overlapping and hold your hands tightly together. Squeeze a little tighter. Look to see if there are any spaces and if so adjust your hands to close them up.

Do you feel tension in your hands, fingers, wrists and arms? Has the grip stopped your blood flowing near the knuckles? Hold it a bit longer to get the full experience in your present awareness.

Next, loosen your grip… more while keeping your fingers laced and thumbs crossed or touching. Notice all the positions your hands can from and still be interlaced together to a greater or lesser degree.

Is there any feelings tension in your arms, wrists, hands in these positions? Notice which positions felt good or relaxed.

Keeping your hands interwoven, push your palms forward and pointing away from you until your arms can stretch no further. Not letting go, gently move them up over your head and feel that stretch that feels so good.

Now move them to one side, circling down or over to the other side. Do it a few times if it feels good, but don’t let go. Notice the comfort, energy and warmth in your body in these positions. Notice your mind noticing your hands gliding in unison and harmony which allows your body to keep your balance. Your mind and body are moving with purpose and connected together at your hands.

You can let go now, have a seat, and ask yourself:

Which grip was most satisfying, the tight or the light one?

Which position was most sustainable, the clenched palms, hands and arms or the interlaced but stretched position? Did you prefer moving your body, staying still or something in-between?

There are no right or wrong answers. Let this body awareness metaphor serve as an anchoring image for you from time to time, by bringing your mind into the present moment, informing you of how good connecting (interlacing of fingers symbolizes connecting with another) feels when it’s open and spacious, allowing energy in and out. It also reminds you how a tight grip, a controlled hold on another leads to pain, stress and burnout.

As Rumi said “Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

Maybe this post’s title should read “Love ME More, then I will let more love in.”

Open up, connect, loosen your grip, move about, feel good, love the balance and energy that comes from unclenching.  Stand with a mindful awareness in this  field of existence to connect and receive, whether it’s for a handshake or a lifetime.

Are you Searching for Love Online? It can take a toll on emotions, time and energy. If you would like assistance and support in finding the right love match for you through online dating sites, I offer profile writing, profile searching and suggest, and short term coaching to women and men over 50 who are seeking to find a serious relationship or marriage.

2 Comments

  1. Excellent thoughts Kim!

  2. This is very much needed. As I found myself divorced afer 33 yrs of being married, and my whole life upside down,I thought to try online dating and felt like I was on a merry go round. Everyone looking and searching. Something like this I think is a great service.
    Thanks Kim ~ CC

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